Thursday, May 31, 2007
The good 'ol days
I think I went overboard on the first part of point # 3. This is why I'm not married anymore.
The "Shut Your Flappin' Pie-Hole" award goes to...
The moron who decided to jet-set with active TB. He's now telling the media that he wasn't told by Health Department officials not to fly, just told that they "preferred" he didn't fly. News flash: flying overseas while having TB is stupid. Flying overseas while awaiting treatment for drug resistant TB is really stupid. Flying overseas while awaiting test results on how drug resistant your TB is--really, really stupid. Flying overseas again, after being told not to when your test results come back while you're kicking it in Italy, then complaining to the media like you didn't do anything wrong----this earns you the "Shut Your Flappin' Pie-Hole" award.
Congratulations, Mr. TB Frequent Flyer. You've also won yourself international news coverage (not much of it good) and an undetermined sentence of CDC enforced isolation! It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.
Congratulations, Mr. TB Frequent Flyer. You've also won yourself international news coverage (not much of it good) and an undetermined sentence of CDC enforced isolation! It couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Happy (?) Memorial Day
Is that not a stupid phrase? What the hell is happy about Memorial Day? Where the hell is a draft when you need one? Then I wouldn't be subjected to chirpy little waitpersons wishing me "Happy Memorial Day". They'd be clearing houses in the Sunni Triangle instead of thinking this is the day that kicks off their Summer of drinking and getting laid. I had friends in the Army that died under all sorts of circumstances---official wars, "police actions" being in the wrong place at the wrong time, plane crashes, suicides...There's a pretty high body count even when there isn't a big war in the news. I doubt their families want to be wished a happy Memorial Day.
Old Army person story: My unit had our official Battalion picnic one year, it was probably a lot like a civilian company picnic. People brought their families, young singles (like me) got drunk and said stupid shit to people who were in charge of them, and we had competitive games between the different companies for bragging rights. The tug-of war was brutal and usually resulted in subsequent knee surgeries for several participants. My favorite was the chariot race--each company built a chariot, the Commander was the driver and had several "horses", the biggest and fastest guys in the unit. It looked like a scene from "Ben Hur" with collisions and dirty tricks all around.
Anyway, one year we had our picnic on a road that went to the drop zones (landing spots for paratrooper practice jumps) on Ft. Bragg. Around mid-afternoon we saw a big cloud of smoke to the East. Then emergency vehicles. Then the MP's blocked off the road. They said there had been a flight demonstration for families at one of the DZ's, and the plane (I think a C-130) had crashed. About this time a Nissan truck came speeding up to the road blockade, and one of several guys in the back yelled "we're SF (Special Forces) medics!". The MP's moved the barricade quickly and the medics sped off. The sad thing was that our Battalion picnic rolled right along. There was a little somberness, but we just kind of shrugged and went back to the party. It wasn't unusual enough to stop our routine.
Old Army person story: My unit had our official Battalion picnic one year, it was probably a lot like a civilian company picnic. People brought their families, young singles (like me) got drunk and said stupid shit to people who were in charge of them, and we had competitive games between the different companies for bragging rights. The tug-of war was brutal and usually resulted in subsequent knee surgeries for several participants. My favorite was the chariot race--each company built a chariot, the Commander was the driver and had several "horses", the biggest and fastest guys in the unit. It looked like a scene from "Ben Hur" with collisions and dirty tricks all around.
Anyway, one year we had our picnic on a road that went to the drop zones (landing spots for paratrooper practice jumps) on Ft. Bragg. Around mid-afternoon we saw a big cloud of smoke to the East. Then emergency vehicles. Then the MP's blocked off the road. They said there had been a flight demonstration for families at one of the DZ's, and the plane (I think a C-130) had crashed. About this time a Nissan truck came speeding up to the road blockade, and one of several guys in the back yelled "we're SF (Special Forces) medics!". The MP's moved the barricade quickly and the medics sped off. The sad thing was that our Battalion picnic rolled right along. There was a little somberness, but we just kind of shrugged and went back to the party. It wasn't unusual enough to stop our routine.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Visiting Mei Lan
I finally got my in-person baby panda fix today. Dianne took me to the zoo.
If you hadn't noticed...baby pandas are cute. Not just cute. CUTE. Big pandas are cute too, perhaps the two are connected? D'ya think? The cute sperm donor babydaddy panda sat and ate his bamboo, unnoticed by all but a few people who glanced up as they left the exhibit. The cute mother panda ate her bamboo, but also stopped to periodically wrestle with the CUTE baby panda. This increased the cuteness quotient exponentially, reducing everyone in the exhibit to making excessively mushy sounds like humans do when they see something cute.
But most of the time the big star was Mei Lan. She did what normal little pandas do, climb, roll over, waddle around, chew on bamboo, or stare off into space. People like me will pay the zoo membership fee of $59 to watch all this for an hour and a half until being thrown out for the next group of panda junkies.
I think the Chinese lied. "Mei Lan" in Mandarin doesn't mean "Atlanta Beauty". It really translates into "The Baby Panda Who Is Worth About A Billion Dollars To The Atlanta Zoo. "
If you hadn't noticed...baby pandas are cute. Not just cute. CUTE. Big pandas are cute too, perhaps the two are connected? D'ya think? The cute sperm donor babydaddy panda sat and ate his bamboo, unnoticed by all but a few people who glanced up as they left the exhibit. The cute mother panda ate her bamboo, but also stopped to periodically wrestle with the CUTE baby panda. This increased the cuteness quotient exponentially, reducing everyone in the exhibit to making excessively mushy sounds like humans do when they see something cute.
But most of the time the big star was Mei Lan. She did what normal little pandas do, climb, roll over, waddle around, chew on bamboo, or stare off into space. People like me will pay the zoo membership fee of $59 to watch all this for an hour and a half until being thrown out for the next group of panda junkies.
I think the Chinese lied. "Mei Lan" in Mandarin doesn't mean "Atlanta Beauty". It really translates into "The Baby Panda Who Is Worth About A Billion Dollars To The Atlanta Zoo. "
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Summer is here
School is out.I have spare time. In a world full of blogs, this is dangerous.
Please secure any loose articles, pets, small children, moral inclinations, and your brain, if you are fond of any of the above. All are fair game on this blog.
Please secure any loose articles, pets, small children, moral inclinations, and your brain, if you are fond of any of the above. All are fair game on this blog.
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